I do not wake up “happy.” I do not greet the dawn with “a smile on my face and a song in my heart.” In fact, my first thought when I awaken is usually, “Oh, crap. I didn’t die in my sleep again last night.”
The older I get, the more I see the daylight hours as something to “get through” in order to reach the night’s quiet solitude.
During the day, I am constrained – by obligations, expectations, and people who have put me in a tidy little box. “We know who you are. Please be that.” Come the night, that all falls away. Alone, in solitude, I can just be me, instead of that.
It is in the lack of light that I truly see. The daylight blinds. It is the night’s darkness that opens wide the eyes. Oh, look at that. How beautiful.
I think better at night, or maybe just more. The days are filled with reacting, to people, situations, and an endless stimulus of sights accompanied by a cacophony of sounds. The night quells those things, leaving only me and my thoughts.
It is in the night that I know who I am and sometimes glimpse what I am to be.
It is in the night that I come to know the
And it is in the night that I have come to know what Paul Simon meant when he wrote,
“Hello, Darkness, my old friend.”
It is in the night.